About

My name is Elly.  I’m a writer living in the DFW area in Texas.  I’ve struggled with OCD my whole life. Writing about it helps me make sense of the mess that is—sometimes—my life.

*    *    *    *

This blog chronicles my journey through therapy for OCD—and for depression and other anxiety issues.  The content is extremely personal, so please be respectful.  This isn’t easy.

The OCD Chronicles is a place for people with OCD (etc.) to connect with each other and share experiences and support, as well as to shed light on an often misunderstood disorder.  I hope that The OCD Chronicles offers a new perspective to those who are unfamiliar with OCD.

Head over to the Best Of page if you need a place to start.  It includes links to posts with background information about me, my OCD, and OCD in general.

*    *    *    *

If you have a question but don’t want to leave it in a comment, email me at ocdjourneyblog@gmail.com.  If you do leave a comment and you have a blog, please leave a link! I’lll try to return visits and comments when I’m able.

If you link to my blog on yours, let me know and I’ll add you to my blogroll.

18 thoughts on “About

  1. Hi Elly~
    Thank you for your blog and your candor. I know from experience, (I too, have OCD) it isn’t easy to share this stuff. I’ve been struggling for a long time about starting a blog, often obsessing and hitting a state of paralysis over the fear that it wouldn’t be good enough. Thanks to bloggers like you, I’m finally taking the plunge. You and others have been an inspiration to me. I thank you for that. Here is the link to my blog: http://ocdodyssey.blogspot.com/. I’d love for you to visit and would love to hear from you and your followers.

    I’m not yet ready to reveal my real identity, so in that vain, I’m keeping the blog anonymous right now and using a pen-name: Aurora.

    Thank you also for the opportunity to link my blog on here. I appreciate it.

    Hang in there
    ~Aurora

    1. Yay! Congrats on starting a blog! I think you will be glad that you started it. Blogging about OCD has been so rewarding for me.

      I will check it out as soon as I can. I can’t promise it will be super soon because I barely have time to keep up with things around here right now, much less all of the other wonderful blogs I like to read. But I will add it to my list and look forward to reading it!

      I don’t blame you for using a pen-name. I don’t use my real name either, mostly because I don’t want this blog to keep me from getting a job in the future.

      1. Thank you, Elly! I’m still figuring out how to “do it” (setting everything up, the nuts and bolts kind of stuff). I hope folks will bear with me. I hope I get folks! That’s one thing I’m not clear on, is how to get readers to the blog.

        I hope things start going better for you with school. I understand how undermining OCD can be. It’s cost me a lot. It cost me a job, damaged relationships with family and some “friends”…and much more. I’ll be writing about that soon. Hang in there and keep fighting. That’s all we can do…keep fighting.

        ~Aurora

  2. I came across your blog while conducting some research for my own. I just wanted to tell you that I admire your bravery in talking about this publicly. I have OCD, as well, and because of past experiences with people who don’t understand, I am terrified to share too much. OCD has been both a blessing and a curse in my life. Learning to deal with my anxiety has taught me valuable lessons about life which I probably wouldn’t have learned otherwise. I feel like I’m a more well-rounded, rational person because I have the disease. And I love that you’re spreading that sentiment in your own way. Keep it up!

    (My blog includes some discussion of OCD, but mostly focuses on the positive changes that have come into my life because of the OCD. Life Lessons of an OCD Housewife ocdhousewife.blogspot.com)

  3. Hello Elly,

    Thank you for sharing your blog with the world.

    It takes an enormous amount of courage to speak openly and candidly about suffering from OCD. I know this from personal experience as I have only recently told my close family and friends about my condition and how it affects my life on a day to day basis. It was exceptionally hard to find the words but I have done it.

    I too have been inspired write a blog concerning my particular struggles with the condition as I look to start undergoing psychotherapy treatment. I wrote my first post some few hours ago at the following address: http://experiencingocd.blogspot.com/

    I have tried to add your site to my following list which I think was successful, although I am not completely sure – Spot the newbie to the world of blogging ay?! I hope it is okay contacting you and by all means feel free to contact me.

    I look forward to reading about your progress and wish you every possible success for the future.

    Best wishes,

    OCD Anonymous (<—– Not my real name!)

    1. Thanks for the kind words! I will definitely plan on reading your blog as soon as I can. Unfortunately, right now, grad school reading is taking up all of my blog reading time. 😦

      It is definitely ok to contact me! In fact, when you get my email notifying you of this comment, feel free to email me at that address whenever. I never mind talking about this kind of stuff!

      And Elly is not my real name either, so don’t worry. A lot of us like to retain some amount of anonymity on the web.

      1. To be honest I only have one post so far as an introductory piece so there is no great urgency to read my blog just yet 🙂 But thank you for responding so quickly and pleasantly – It’s really nice to meet people and chat about it.

        Do you find blog writing a good form of therapy? I enjoy writing, not specifically about OCD, and have quite enjoyed my short time in front of the computer today and have found writing about it stops me thinking too much about it!

        Thanks for inviting me to contact you via email 🙂 You are more than welcome to write to me too.

        Enjoy your reading!

        1. Blogging is absolutely a good form of therapy for me. I have been a major slacker lately, but when I started this in May or June 2010, I wrote a couple of times a week sometimes, especially after therapy appointments. Writing about therapy really helped me process the things I had learned that day in therapy.

          Plus, I think (and hope) you will find that speaking/writing about things like this to be a very positive experience. I tried to hide my OCD for 10 years before finally realizing last year how stupid that is. My life has greatly improved now that everyone in my life knows what I’m fighting. Receiving support via the blogosphere also makes it worth it. I can’t even begin to tell you how much moral support and encouragement I have gotten from people I’ve never met.

          It’s important to connect to other people fighting similar battles. Networking online like this is the easiest way to accomplish that these days. I have a support group that I have not attended in months because I never seem to have time. I miss it a lot, but connecting with other OCDers online really helps. Especially because OCD makes it sufferers feel so crazy and stupid, it can be wonderful to talk with people who don’t think you’re crazy and stupid when you can’t walk away from the sink or something. It really helps me stay grounded and more in tune with reality.

  4. Just came across your blog, and am looking forward to exploring it more – you’re doing some really good stuff here. I have OCD – mostly Pure O now – but it has manifested more externally in the past; I also have dermatillomania, but there seem to be so few resources out there about this, so thank you for writing about it. The communal blog I am part of is not about OCD specifically, but I have written posts about it, particularly in relation to religious scrupolosity and academic editing.Anyway, I look forward to reading more of what you have written.

    1. Thank you! I hope to see you around here more. Writing about dermatillomania was so hard because it’s super embarrassing. I still have a really hard time talking about it. And so many people don’t understand it at all. But the feedback I’ve gotten has been amazing. There are a lot of us out there and knowing that we exist is really helpful in dealing with it.

  5. I was also thinking of starting a blog about my struggle with OCD as I have had it for 10 years or so. The only thing that’s holding me back is that my OCD focuses on three fears, two of which are pretty embarrassing to write and share on the internet. The only one I would feel comfortable talking about is the fear of germs and contamination. It was really cool seeing your blog though and its inspiring to see others deal with OCD in a positive way despite it being such a terrible disorder. I’ve been doing cognitive behavioral therapy for 4 years and it has helped tremendously although I haven’t come quite as far as I’ve liked in getting better. My OCD is still pretty severe and difficult to handle and I realize that it is very complex. My fears have developed and increased somewhat over the years and now I can’t really continue therapy because it is WAY to expensive for my family to afford (we’ve already spend $8000) I tried medicine (Zoloft and Abilify) but I hated the side effects that I experienced. Right now I’m really in a difficult place so maybe starting a blog would help me deal with some of the stress/anxiety I’m feeling. Sorry for blabbing so much about me and my OCD, I just wanted to share my experience and get some input about starting a blog and how to go about sharing embarrassing fears and such. It’s encouraging to see that I’m not the only one dealing with OCD 24/7.

    1. Thank you. I know it can be really hard to talk about this stuff, but I encourage you to think about doing so anyway. The brilliant thing about blogging about OCD is that you can do it anonymously. You can make up a name, forgo using a picture, and not advertise it to anyone you know personally. There’s something very freeing about revealing the parts of OCD of which you’re ashamed. The reason I hope you do it eventually is the feedback you’ll get. You’d be amazed at how much positive support you’ll receive from fellow sufferers online, people who are complete strangers but want to connect with you. We’re all dying to know that we’re not alone in our embarrassing behaviors and thoughts. The only way to step out of that is to share. I was so nervous at first, but I’ve only gotten acceptance and encouragement since revealing these things.

      Never apologize for sharing. This is why I love having this blog. Reading others’ experiences helps me deal with mine.

      You definitely aren’t alone. Please, feel free to email me if you ever just want to vent or chat about OCD. You can reach me at ocdjourneyblog@gmail.com.

  6. Dear Elly, 02-22-2014

    Is your site still active? I came across it a year or so ago; and I was very impressed with your insightful and openness demeanor. I think that your very inspiring, and a beautiful caring person! I wanted to respond, but wasn’t in the right space at the time. Since that time, I have thought about your words often, and now desire to participate.
    Sincerely, Steve

    P.S., Please don’t critique my writing and punctuation (i.e., I’ve seen your excellent writing skills); I didn’t go on for my Master’s, stopped with a B.S., and that was twenty years ago! In regards to “OCD”, I came out of the closet at age (35) thirty-five.

    1. My site isn’t really active. I update it every few months, but I’m in grad school and don’t have time for much more. I hope to get back to it when I graduate—if that ever happens.

      I’m so glad to hear from you. It really does mean so much. I’m glad to know that my words can mean something to someone.

      And no worries. I’m an English nerd and don’t expect anyone—except my students, that is—to have perfect grammar.

  7. Dear Elly, 3-4-2014

    Thank you for your reply. I’m glad that your back at school; and regardless of your time constraints, I will be checking your site regularly for more of your insider views. I didn’t mention this earlier, but I am also a chronic pain patient, thus, just re-reading your blogs helps me to re-evaluate, make decisions, etc., in regards to how my “OCD” mixes into the pain issues, dealing with my health professionals, fear of medications, on and on.

    Sincerely, Steve

    P.S., [two more comments] First, as I often re-read your blogs, it is as if you were putting into words what I have felt for a lifetime, but was never able to explain it, which while definitely distressing, but in a strange way, very comforting! I’ve always told my various “Therapists”, I wish that there was some way that they could live in my body for a day (i.e., to gain a true understanding of how the “OCD” impacts me), but now through using portions of your depictions, I am better able to convey my thoughts and feelings. You have a unique gift, and I’m ecstatic that your willing to share it!

    Secondly, regardless of the the issues and pain that the “OCD” has created for me [and to others], the depth of emotions that I’m able to feel, is the one positive features that I would never wish to eliminate (i.e., even if it means living with “OCD”)!

    Thanks Again, Steve

    1. It’s so hard to balance so many different issues! Things like mental illness and chronic pain tend to be invisible to other people, too, which means we’re suffering from a lot of things other people can’t see. And a lot of time, people things that these invisible issues are just “all in our heads” and we should just stop. That’s why I think talking about these issues and being open about them is so important. People suffering from these things need to understand that their suffering is real and their feelings are valid. And outsiders need to understand that what we have is real.

      Thank you so much for your kind words. The big part of why I started this blog was to attempt to put my experience into words, in hopes that my experience would resonate with others. I know how frustrating it is to be unable to communicate your thoughts and feelings. It’s maddening. I’m glad my experience has helped you vocalize yours.

      And I agree fully. OCD and pain and anxiety and depression are all so difficult to deal with, and sometimes I wish I didn’t have to struggle with any of them. But I also know that all of these things have helped make me who I am, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. I believe you can’t fully appreciate goodness and beauty without having experienced at least a little pain and suffering. I’m so much more grateful for good days when they follow bad ones.

  8. Just came across your site. Like others, I appreciate you sharing your stories and experience. And for me, it’s especially helpful to find someone writing about contamination issues. I’ll be checking out some of your writing. All the best to you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s